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What are we watching?
Judge Judy!

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Court.
Rooms.

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I dunno what the show is called.

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It's on TV all the time over here.
It must be like season four hundred and twelve.

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She's street-smart. She takes no bullshit from anyone.
Yeah.

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I'd love to be the bailiff. I'd be there like ohm nom nom "This is amazing."

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VO:...For damage caused to her car when his son kicked it.

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Ohhhhhh he "kicked a car."

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Okay, guilty. the kid's like...
Yeah, yeah.

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JJ: Lamont left his basketball in your yard.
Yes ma'am.

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Oh my god, the plot thickens.

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You took the basketball. And you took it inside.

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Where do they get the crowd? I presume the crowd are just the next people on the case.

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During that exchange he kicked your car.

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How much damage can an 11 year-old do?
With a kick? Amazing! He's a kid, kickin'.

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Up here.
Look at his little innocent face!

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I really hope the parent is counter suing for the car being too hard and him damaging his shoes.

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Did you kick her car?
No, ma'am.

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JJ: Who kicked her car?
Lamont: No one.

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That kid is terrified; he's like, "I'm going to f--king jail!"

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The defendant is having to do nothing so far. He's just sitting there, arms behind his back, just, "I got this."

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JJ: You told the police that you kicked the car.
I lied to the police.

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He LIED to the police! He's going to jail. He's getting the chair. SHE GROANS Lamar is getting the chair!

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When you hold onto someone's property and refuse to return it to them, it's a LARCENY!

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She's going down!

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Make up your mind Judge Judy whose side you're on.

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They're not going to give her the money.
No they're not.

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Judgement for the plaintiff in the amount of $700.
TOGETHER: WHAT? WHAT?? BULLSHIT! WHERE'D THAT COME OUT OF?

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I hadn't a clue which way she was going.
Err...
She kept it interesting.

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99% of Judge Judy's cases are ruled around, "Don't be a sassy little pants, mister."

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But you wouldn't want her to get angry at you.
Nooo. I'd love to watch her get angry at someone who was trying to take it out on me and me just being like...

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Like usually when you hear an argument, you try to understand both sides. She straight didn't understand either side.

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VO: Laura Taylor is suing her neighbor Kelly Bruniker for destruction of her property caused by Kelly's pigs.

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TOGETHER: Ahaha! Woahhh! And there's the twist.

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Her pigs.
Ooo.
Interesting.

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I think they were supposed to small pigs, but they ended up big.

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The pigs started off real small, and then two weeks later... real big!

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Your claim that her pigs came in and destroyed your garden, your property...

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And they kicked her car.

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Wait, what's the problem with the pigs?
I think they et her son.

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JJ: She says it was somebody else's pigs.
Is she denying that it's her pigs?

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Somebody else's pigs done did it!
I'm ready to see the video.

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Ohh, look at his wiggly little tail!
TOGETHER: Ahhhhh!

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TOGETHER: Ohhhhh ha ha!
He's so cute. Oh, he's even cuter!

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We're in the playground.
He just wants to go on the seesaw.
On the slide.

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This is an abhorrent affront to humanity and justice. Turn the camera sideways, you idiot.

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I'd like to see a picture of the pigs you own.
So do I!

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So that's absolutely one of the pigs that was...
TOGETHER: Ohhhhhhh. Piggy bad.

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Imagine if you put them little glasses and a wig on it and was like, "My pig has hair and needs glasses. These aren't my pigs!"

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Yes.
JJ: You can stand there and be smug all that you like...
TOGETHER: Ohhh! I don't think she was that bothered!

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Oh god, she's so sassy.

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Are they going to bring a pig into the courtroom and see if it bites her? Please tell me that's going to happen.

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She brings the pig into the stall. "You either lie to the police officers or you lie to me, pig? Which one was it?"

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Judgement for the plaintiff in the amount of $5,000. We're done here.

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Five grand? And for what?
She got it!
What? Yes. She's... so... oh, she's a wannabe.

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It's like I've got pictures of my pigs and she was like, "NO!"
This was an ace, Judy."

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We could watch 50 of these and we'd never be able to guess who would win, at the start of the court case.

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Apparently she's like 74.
Really? She looks well.
She looks very well.
I would.